Birthday

If you are joining in the dinner portion of the Dixie and TJ birthday party, the venue has moved to the Kobe Japanese Steakhouse on North Dale Mabry. It seems Arigato's caught fire. Candles on my cake are not to blame.

If you are coming to the main event, the plan remains the same. 9:00, 12/29, Green Parrot Pub.

Can you belive that people say I am hard to shop for? Here is a picture of this mornings desk:

Quick joke

Here is a quick theology joke . . . . . mainly for Eric.

There was little boy who was raised in a conservative religious home that believed in predestination. One day the boy fell over a pair of skates he had left at the top of the stairs. After falling head over heels to the bottom of the stairs, he dusted himself off and said "Boy, I'm glad that's over with."

Bwaaaa ha ha ha

Leaving on a jet plane

Leaving on a jet plane - an Airbus A-330 to be precise. We start boarding in just a few minutes if all goes well. I just spoke to my sister and she said that the weather is beautiful, and in the mid 50's - but that is going to change suddenly and drastically.

I was planning on going shopping for my nephews when I got there - but my sister just suggested putting some dollar bills in an envelope . . . . . . can do!! That means that I only visited one store to shop this year (although I did need to make a couple of trips due to "inventory issues")

Happy holidays to all!

Not Good!

Do you know what this is?


That's correct. It is the downfall of human civilization as we know it. They have redesigned bubble wrap. If you look carefully you can see that each bubble has a small channel that connects it to the contiguous bubbles. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS?! Well, I will tell you what it means: one can't pop them! The other bubbles rally together in communistic fashion and share the increase of pressure. And should you succeed in popping one of the bubbles by using, say in a fit of desperate rage,with a paperclip, all of the other bubbles in that row deflate in a solidarity protest.

I say again: NOT GOOD!

Whoohoo

My attorney just gave me a $100 gift card to Dunkin' Donuts, and a client did the same with a $25 card that's two whole months of muffin and ice coffee goodness!

Dec 29 Detail

Here are some details . . . . We are going to get together for dinner at Arigato Japanese Steakhouse at 7:00, and then move to the Green Parrot Pub for drinks, dancing and singing (karaoke) at about 9:00.

Please send me a message if you plan on coming to the dinner part so I can make a reservation for one of the big tables!

Arigato: http://maps.google.com/maps?q=13755+N+Dale+Mabry+Hwy,+Tampa,+FL&ie=UTF8&z=16&om=1&iwloc=addr

Green Parrot: http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&hl=en&q=11759+N+Dale+Mabry+Hwy+tampa+fl&ie=UTF8&z=16&om=1&iwloc=addr

Read the following url to yourself before clicking, but you really do want to click on it!

http://www.gizmodo.com/gadgets/gadgets/humping-dog-usb-drive-robs-us-all-of-precious-dignity-221189.php

Some of you may remember when I first reported about the Russian squirrels. They are up to no good again!

But the Scots know how to deal with this!

Welcome Emost!
http://emost.blogspot.com

Time Marches On . . . . .

Dixie's B-day, Christmas and my B-day all fall within a period of 6 days! So mark your calendars for the night of Friday, 12.29.06 for the DDBTJBISCPHP! That's the Dixie Davenport Birthday,T.J. Birthday, I Survived Christmas Post Holiday Party! I have no idea where this is going to be yet . . . . . somewhere in Hillsborough County. Stay Tuned.

Reject!

So I just finished the much anticipated photo "there is no way I am shopping in a mall" calendar that will once again provide holiday cheer to family and friends.

I thought it might be fun to show some pictures that did not make the cut:

The first reject is a very cool time-lapse photo of a campfire. It might have made the cut if it were not for the maniacal grin on my sister. It is a shame when she is off her meds.



While this is a very cute picture of the nephews, I made the command decision that this year's photo calendar would be 100% fish gut free.



While every calendar needs a giant picture of a skeleton with crab-trap boobs smoking a cigarillo, I just could not figure out which month it would best fit in.



This one was cut for one simple reason. Matty would kill me.



I really like this picture of Dixie . . . she probably does not, I don't think she has even seen it before . . . . I was about 100 yards away from her when I snapped it.

So in the desire to keep the peace, and from being smothered in my sleep - it hit the cutting room floor.



This would be a picture of our in-house attorney cleaning my office floor. There is just something about this pic that makes you feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside. I jest. He is a great guy, and this picture proves it! However . . . he is one of the soon-to-be recipients of the calendar - best to omit it.



While this picture is an excellent example of composition, lighting, color, and micro-focus, it is still a picture of a bug that is nearly the size of a ball park frank. Eeww.



This picture is kinda neat . . . I almost put it on the December page . . . . . but the focus was just a bit shallow. And it is a little sappy too.



So there you have it - a little preview of what is NOT going to be in this year's calendar.

Hope every one's holiday plans are coming together, that you are not stressing . . . . I was . . . but I am better now that I have clicked "submit order" on the Kodak page. Ho, ho, ho.

Bored?

If so, complete this quiz!



1. Do you know the actual time that you were born?

2. Have you ever been seen naked by a large group of strangers?

3. Are you concerned when you hear that the Federal Open Market Committee is meeting?

4. Do you know how the little canister tube thingy at banks works?

5. You see a child run out into the street as a car rapidly approaches; what do you do?

6. You see a cat run out into the street as a car rapidly approaches; what do you do?

7. Do you know what a megapixel is? Really?

8. How cold do you think it would need to be for all molecular motion to stop?

9. If I asked you for an updated resume right now, how long would it take for you to produce one?

10. Have you ever had a successful relationship with anyone that you have met in a bar?

11. Who did your 2005 tax return?

12. How many of your friends revel in telling you about how drunk they got last night?

13. Ever watched an eclipse? (The astronomical event, not a Nissan)

14. Did you know that an Eclipse is actually made by Mitsubishi?

15. What is you favorite highlighter color?

16. A friend of mine has a pair of sandals that have a bottle opener integrated into the sole of the shoe. What is your take on that?

17. Clowns: Source of amusement or Emissaries of Satan?

18. Let’s say someone linked all of the paperclips on your desk together to form a chain . . . . . your reaction would be?

Back to work

Wow. I have concluded that we need more 4 day weekends. Thanksgiving was not much of a production this year . . . it was spent with friends rather than making the stressful rounds to all of the family member's far-flung homes. Don't get me wrong - I love spending time with the family - just not ALL of the family in ONE day.

I got out to take some pictures for the annual calendar - with the lovely photographer's assistant in tow. Some of them are pretty good - but boy, do I need more of them!

This happens every year . . . November is flying by and I realize that I have not taken nearly enough calendar-worthy pictures.

Perhaps the best moment of the day was when we got caught in the wing tip vortex of a plane after I took the following picture.

Pull the lever

So the votes have been counted . . . . no real big surprises for me.

Winners that make me glad that they won: Nelson, Castor, Mack, Sink, V. Crist, Homan.

Winners that make me sad, and somewhat scared: Storms.

It was hard choosing between C. Crist and Davis – both are good people in my opinion.

The amendments: Booooo! Stop messing with the Constitution . . . . . what happened to good old-fashioned legislation? The irony of #3 passing by 57% is not lost on me.

Today's WTF item:

Clicky

Farewell to Anthony

We had a send off for Anthony on Saturday night. In this picture he is lamenting the fact that he only just met Martha.

No send off is complete with out a great big fire.......and beautiful babes!

Some of us had our drinks straight up, others preferred "on the rocks."

Fortunately, Lee's expert driving skills kept him from getting stuck in any cracks. (Sorry Eric, I had to!)

It's been too long - but here's today's news!

He armed himself with a pillowcase. I think I would have selected something else from my arsenal.

From Norway we have the following quote, ""It might be an animal, the remains of algae, something which has been alive, or a mysterious accumulation of microorganisms," were some of Brattegard's initial theories." Or it could just be a big blob of squid goo.

In this article we have the following quote, "Drinking just three cups of coffee a day decreases men's ability to father normal children, new research suggests. " Is this the reason why kids are wearing their hats sideways and their pants 6 sizes too large. And can someone explain the hamster thing to me?

So . . . . . what is the legal way of dumping a giant dead snake?


Seriously . . . . where was the editor when this headline was penned?

October Wrap-up

Here are some fun pics from our Halloween bash.

My friend Elizabeth (R) came to the party dressed as . . . . me. So did a couple others. Too funny. Dan even shaved his head!



A ghostly picture of my favorite witch:



Glad to see the trailer park was empty that night: Get 'r' Done!



Our host has a flare for pumpkin carving . . . who knew?



Dixie won first place in the costume contest. Go figure.

Tellico Tale *Continued*

Many of the Tellico trails appear to be old logging roads . . . with off-camber grades, loose rocks and sheer drop-offs. At least there are lots of trees to break your fall and bash your Jeep. I am happy to say that this did not happen on our trip. Other parts of the trail reminded me of driving on rough cobblestone road in Germany . . . . although some of the cobbles are somewhat large!





There were only two times on the ride that I was really uncomfortable. The first was on the obstacle called "Slick Rock."

Here is what one trail review magazine has to say about it,

"Trail #9. Rated Most Difficult. Known as "Hard Rock" going up and "Slick Rock" coming down, either way, this trail provides plenty of excitement. The approach to the rock runs right up a creek bed with lots of big, loose muddy boulders that get shifted around each time someone goes up. Steering linkage damage and tires coming off the rim happen quite frequently here. There is no getting around Hard Rock, so when you reach this point on Trail 9 you are committed. The rock has a very smooth surface, is about two stories tall, and has a natural spring at the base to ensure that it's always muddy and wet. There are three lines that can be taken to ascend the rock, you can hang either far left for the easiest approach; far right and it will be an 8-9 climb, or you can attempt the middle and take your chances! This is a favorite place for the locals to gather and watch the show and rollovers are quite common. The fun is not over when you get to the top of Hard Rock either, as there is still a couple of good ledges awaiting you before you run into Trail 8. "

Yeah. I would be one of those potential "roll overs." As I was climbing up I lost traction on one of my front tires which caused my Jeep to yaw perpendicular to the incline. Eric . . . . although not nearly as quickly as I would have liked, attached my winchline to a tree to keep me stable and to swing my front around in the right direction.

The other time that caused my eyes to bug was when we came to a huge obstacle on the upper #2 trail. Inside of a washed out channel is a boulder that is basically impassable without a winch. The tricky bit is that the boulder is at an angle on the top, so as you winch over it your Jeep is pushed closer and closer to the jagged rocks on the side of the channel. I though I was destined for certain body damage. This is where the AiROCK system on my Jeep paid (ok, not quite "paid") for itself, as I was able to "lean" my Jeep out of harm's way.

Tales from Tellico - An Introduction

So I recently returned from the great cross county Jeep adventure. The trail ride was lead by Larry - He has been on the trails many times and made for a great leader. There is a small $5 fee per vehicle - you stuff your money into an envelope and then give it to the "iron ranger." Larry was also driving a red Jeep.

Doug was driving a khaki Jeep and big 37" competition tires. He also had beadlocks which hold the tire on the rim with the air pressure lowered for greater traction. He also served as surrogate to Daniqua. Don't ask.


Next we have the lovely and sinuous Sharon. I spent most of the time looking at her back-side. By which I mean, I followed her on the trail. And she showed no fear - several times she had a wheel off the ground.


Eric - who has an amazing ability to retrieve wayward breakfast foods- did not have his Jeep with him, so he rode shotgun with Larry (well actually he rode .357 - but I digress) He did a great job of taking pictures and spotting the trail lines and repeatedly setting the winch line when we had to pull ourselves over an obstacle.

And then . . there is me. I have spent the last two years prepping my Jeep for a trip like this. There was really a lot riding on it . . . . if my Jeep did not perform well I would have really been disappointed. I am happy to report that it exceeded my expectations.

Eric and I rode up together from Tampa on Tuesday - we got to Murphy, N.C. at about 11 p.m. Traffic was a breeze - it was nice being able to use the HOV lane through downtown Atlanta. The weather on the first day was incredible - crisp, clear and the fall foliage was breathtaking. The first day was, as it turns out, mild. Lots of rocks everywhere, and the trails were a constant thrill as we snaked through the forest.

I felt really inadequate at lunch time . . . . Eric and I just grabbed sandwiches (and some great banana pudding) from a grocery store - but everyone else broke out the camp-ware and made chicken stew, and fettuccine alfredo!

More details and pics to follow!

Really busy trying to get on the road . . .

But I had to write a response to the following bulletin that is being circulated on the internet.


A rebuttal (in bold) from a nice guy that is sane, self-secure, mature and happy-in-life.


*If he's not calling you, it's because you're not on his mind
No. He could actually be busy, or trying to work on a nice surprise for you.

*If he creates expectations for you, and then doesn't follow through on little things, he will do the same for big things. Be aware of this and realize that he's okay with disappointing you.
No. Some people make mistakes. There are too many variables in life to extrapolate out a tidy little “test.” Thinking “Oh no, he forgot I said that I wanted to go to the mall tonight . . . . that means he won’t be there for me when I really need him!” is simply ridiculous.

*Don't be with someone who doesn't do what they say they're going to do.
If it is the norm . . . yes, I agree.

*"Busy" is another word for "asshole." "Asshole" is another word for the guy you're dating.
No.

*If at all possible, try to get to know someone as best you can before you get naked with them.
“If at all possible”?! You think? I hope that would be a requirement – otherwise you are a tart/slut/tramp or really insecure.

*If a man is really into you, nothing will stop him from being with you - including a fear of intimacy.
Probably true.

*Whatever problems you may have been having in your relationship, they didn't merit him having sex with someone else.
I think that would depend on the construct of the relationship. If you discussed and agreed on having an exclusive relationship, I agree.

*An excuse is a polite rejection. Men are not afraid of "ruining the friendship."
Right. Did you also know that men with blond hair also eat newborn babies with jam and toast? This statement is a generalization that may not be true.

*If you can find him, then he can find you. If he wants to find you, he will.
True. Unless he is stupid.

*Cheating is bad. Not knowing why you cheated is even worse. Don't date any man who doesn't know why he does things.
Yes, cheating is bad. And he knows why he cheated. It is because he does not like you as much as you like him.

*100 men polled said they have never accidentally slept with anyone.
Read this sentence out loud. I would not trust statistics from someone that can not construct a sentence.

*100 men polled said they've never been too busy to call a woman they were really into.
Did she mean to say “100 percent of men polled?”

*Cheating is cheating. It doesn't matter whom it was with or how many times it happened.
Again, was the relationship exclusive?

*Cheating gets easier every time it's done. It's only hard the first time, when one feels the sting of morality and the guilt of betraying someone's trust.
Probably true.

*It doesn't count unless he says it when he's sober. An "I Love You" (or any semblance thereof) while under the influence of anything stronger than grape juice won't hold up in court or in life.
Oh please. Grow up.

*If he only wants to see you, talk to you, have sex with you, etc., when he's inebriated, it ain't love - it's sport.
True enough.

*Don't spend your time on and give your heart to any guy who makes you wonder about anything related to his feelings for you.
If you follow this advice you will spend your life alone.

*If you feel that's he's always holding something back, or that you're spending a lot of energy trying to change yourself into something you think will make him happier, then divorce yourself from him and move on.
All humans are always holding something back. Accept it! As for changing people . . . . don’t confuse change with compromise. I would hope for a relationship where you pick up on each other’s positive traits and become better people as a result. . . . look up the Gestalt Theory.

*100 guys polled said they would have no problem marrying a woman who they were positive was the love of their life.
This pseudo-statistic stuff is going to make my head explode.

*It's very tempting when you really want to be with someone to settle for much, much less - even a vague, pathetic facsimile of less - than you would have ever imagined. Remember always what you set out to get, and please don't settle for less.
If you are not happy, move on!

*Deciding to get back together with someone is a complicated and difficult decision. Just remember that the person that you are getting back together with is the same person who, not long before, looked you in your beautiful face, took full stock of you and all your qualities, and told you that he was no longer in need of your company.
Oh wow. Bitter. Grow up.

*You can't talk your way out of a breakup. It is not up for discussion. A breakup is a definitive action, not a democratic one.
Oh yes, here’s a good mantra, “Communication=bad!”

*Break-up sex still means you're broken up.
No, it means you have little self-worth and are insecure. Or just a slut.

*CUT HIM OFF, LET HIM MISS YOU.
Uh huh. Playing games. Great course of action.

*Don't give him the chance to reject you again.
Building walls. Great idea. Soon we will hear wedding bells, and then a year later lawyers arguing as the judge bangs his gavel.

*If the person you "love" cannot freely spend his days thinking about you and being with you, it's not REAL love.
Sounds somewhat trite . . . but has the roots of plausibility.

*Unless he's all yours, he's still hers.
Did she get this out of a fortune cookie? Could it be that the relationship is still developing?

*Try not to be 4 years into the relationship when it suddenly dawns on you that the guy you're with is a big, selfish jerk.
Good advice. I personally would aim for maybe 4 hours . . . .

*You deserve to be with someone who is nice to you all the time. (You have to be nice to them, too.)
Yes, that is an ideal belief. Don’t forget that everyone has a bad day - even you.

*You already have one asshole. You don't need another.
Yes, unless you are full of shit – otherwise it sound like a perfect match.

Outta here!

I leave for a Jeep adventure tomorrow. Much to do.

For those of you with Myspace.

Don't Change Your Top 5-fill the people in below-answer the questions truthfully.
Number 1: Dixie
Number 2: Petey
Number 3: Angela
Number 4: Shelby
Number 5: Eli

Have you ever danced with 3? Oh yes. I seem to have a foggy memory of being on a stage whilst dancing!

Where did you meet number 5? Jeeping

Have you ever hugged number 2? No, but I have scratched behind his ears. And he has dry-humped my leg.

Have you ever gotten drunk/high with number 4? Yup. Most recently the night before the wedding.

Has 1 been to your house?: Once or twice. Hell – she has cleaned my house!

Has number 2 ever seen you naked?: Nope, even though he offered to dry-hump me.

Have you ever gone shopping with 3?: Hmmmm. Maybe for beer.

Have you ever seen 2 in a swimsuit?: Nope – but I have seen him in his birthday suit.

Have you ever met 1's family?: Yes, and survived to tell the tale.

Do you know 1's middle name?: "Lee"

Have you ever eaten anything in front of 3? Yes.

Have you ever hated number 4? No! No! No! Who could hate Sheby?

Have you ever fought with number 2? I saw what he did to the other Couch. No way, I know my limits.

When's the last time you talked to 5 in person? Saturday at the costume party. Oddly enough it was like talking to myself.

Have you ever seen 3 do something embarassing? Heh. Yeah.

Are any of your top 5 family members? Nope.

Has anyone in your top 5 seen you cry? Sigh, yes. When Saxon died.

Have you ever done something dangerous with number 4? Drunken night,on the shore of the San Antonio River. We could have drowned. Maybe, how deep is that river?

Have you ever slept in the same bed as number 2? Nope.

Have you ever slept in the same bed as number 1? Yup.

Do you think 4 and 5 would make a good couple?: For a saucy TV show, yes.

Have you dating/dated someone on your top 5? Yup

Has 5 ever bought you something really special/expensive?: Not yet. But I am sure she will.

Will you do anything for number 1? Just about.

Has 3 ever helped you out? In so many ways.

How do you feel when 2 hugs you? Violated.

A sign from above

For the last hour I have been watching from my office window the Clear Channel guys install a new billboard.

Perfect.

Roaches and other vermin

Scarlet, our Melbourne Bureau Chief, brought to our attention this news story. I, uh, think I would spring for the $200 admission fee. PETA, of course, has something to say about this. I believe their battle cry is Save The Roaches! I wonder how PETA people handle love bug season?

And the other story she sent me is, in a word, awesome. Although I think taping a photo-collage of this person to the windshield would be just as effective. Or maybe this one. Or if you park in a very high crime area, this would be your best bet.

I love October

3.14159. . . . . .

Pretty Flowers! Took this pic just yesterday.

So last night the Dixie and I met up with Gecko, Jen and Emost and gorged on brats at Der Schnitzelhaus. Sweet Jesus! It was so good - and a great way to start of my October.

Tonight it is off to the theatre to see "A Light in the Piazza."

It would seem to be International Week.

On to today's headlines:

Prai$e God!

Snicker-Snort-Giggle.

Hmmmmm . . . I wonder if he is available to do parties?

Picture and other news

This is a bit of a strange picture. Those are crab trap floats strung on on a wire for decoration around a nautical bar. I think I was leaning waaaaay back on the bar stool when I tool the picture.

So here is a fun website to check out . . . I find it to be fairly accurate.

Well it would seem that the snakes have been able to elevate themselves on the desirability scale. Curious.

OK . . . . this is kinda cool. But call me old fashioned . . . is there really anything wrong with this?

Happy Wednesday everyone!

I took this just off of the Blue Ridge Parkway, on Schulls Mill Road.


So in the news today . . . . Those kooky Norwegians are up to it again. Key quote, "...the point was to have a pleasant toilet..."

Yeah . . . . . so there are many hazards out there that can result in a vehicular accident. However, if my Jeep was in the median with the rubber side up, and this was the cause, I am not sure I would admit it. . . . maybe brag about it to my friends at the bar, but certainly not to the authorities.


THIS HAS TO BE A JOKE.



Rexburg = snakes.

Wilford = snakes.

There will be no living with her after this. . . . .

Bugs!

Well folks, the weekend is nearly here - and not soon enough!

Today's pictures feature some creepy-crawlies that I shot for a local science museum . . . . I think they used the photos on educational signs in the butterfly encounter. I really do not know what these are beyond one is a caterpillar that is slinging itself up in a silk hammock before going into chrysalis . . . and the other is a chrysalis . . . . perhaps someone who can ID these will chime in . . . . .

Jeeping!

I had a blast yesterday while exploring a new wheeling site in the Hudson area. It seems that it is an old class 3 landfill (construction debris) that is no longer in use. The junk has long been covered up with fill dirt, which makes for some great hill climbing opportunities! Mike is pictured here pushing the skinny pedal to get his rig to the top - pictures never really show how steep the inclines are!



Chris found an off-camber trail that was composed of sugar sand. He nearly made it through - but a sheer wall of sand barred his path.






Here we see Monkey-Boy-Bobby watching someone else's Jeep. Watch and learn, young grasshopper! Kidding - he did great . . . . an only used 1.2 gallons of tranny fluid.



At the end of a hard day of wheeling, I decided that my Jeep deserved a bath. Yes, my Jeep is under there . . . somewhere.

Gloomy

"Wine and Opera 101" = *YAWN*

The wine tasted like landfill leachate, the room was small, crowded and about 95F, and too loud to hear the poor performer. Outside the rain came down in buckets making all of the previously-well-made-up women cross.

Today's picture is one that I took during the most unattractive Florida sunset I have ever seen. Location is Seaplane Basin on the southern tip of Davis Islands. I admit there has been a little bit of photo-manipulation in this one.

Today's image

Here is a pic of local musician Carrie Pigeon. She was performing at a place I used to frequent with a nice outdoor patio. The low light level and slow shutter speed made for ghostly representation.

Arrrrrrr Mateys, the tide is high

So here it is: Talk Like A Pirate Day. And instead of doing a piratey thing tonight I am attending an event titled "Wine and Opera 101." Thursday will be spent with pirates instead. Oh well . . . so much for elegant timing.

So.....mental note: Never accept an invitation to a South African Cuisine Party.

In snake sightings: Keep your arms and legs inside the vehicle at all times.

This headline leaped off the page at me. Bummer. I had big plans for my jumper leads. Oh well. I doubt Dixie would have gone for it anyway.

Please tell me that "booger" is some form of CSI jargon of which I am unaware.

This could become a new obsession.

All they need now is coin operated steamer and drawn butter dispenser!

This is great!

Happy weekend all!

NEWS FLASH!

This just in from our field reporter in Melbourne:

This just goes to show why knickers are a wholly bad idea.

Pigeons, and Spiders, and 'Coons, Oh my!

Here's a news flash: Death is a side effect of poison. Quote, "McMillen said the bank hadn't intended to harm any birds." Yup. That is true. They hired a pest service to do it for them! What ever - they are one of the foulest creatures in my book.

After reading this article I find myself thinking, "Why did this have to be a Florida story."

Eeeeek!

Heh - I like the way this guy works! Very clever. I don't think much of the detainee thing . . . . . now strapping a real detainee into a "It's a Small World" boat . . . . . I think you know where I am going with that.

Here's a new spin on a time-honored excuse.

Chirp-chrip chirp-chrip

Ahhhhh, the sound of crickets.

Sorry folks I have been a bit under the weather. Good news: prescription drugs=good thing. I am not sure why I waited so long to go to the doctor . . . . I always do.

In Jeep news, yet another modification has been made. I now have a stronger front axle, new gear ratios and a nifty device that forces all 4 wheels to spin at the same speed when in 4 wheel drive. (For the non gear-heads . . . 4WD is actually a bit of misnomer. When a stock vehicle is in 4wd really only one wheel in the front and one in the rear is getting power from the engine-and it is the wheel with the least amount of resistance. So even if you have 4wd, if you are on loose sand or mud, or lift a tire off the ground, you will still get easily stuck.)

So today is my first day back in the office since mid last week. So swamped.

Now back to work.

Arrrrrr.

Make fast, and be ye on the ready, says I.

As the Donald would say . . . . .

It only makes since that Radio Shack, a purveyor of high tech tidbits would use this method to downsize.

Which makes me wonder . . . . .

Would the All Star Flag Company use this method?

Ace Above would have an impressive, but somewhat impersonal method.

Ford Motor Company could use this method.

The Florida Orchestra would use this egregious method.

Now 100% Ernesto Free!

So the doctor says that I have a viral infection in my eye. Eeeeek! But it is much feeling much better and no longer looks like something out of a horror movies involving the CDC and scientists in bunny suits. The bad news is that I have to wear glasses for the next three weeks, and according to the Dixie, they "are not flattering."

Nice.

So, moving on in world news:

• I think the nice folks at Mattel may have snapped. Or maybe the Mattel lawyers are trying to develop a sense of humor.

• Let me say that people need to be more involved in world events. Pick a cause . . . . . any cause . . . . and run with it.

• OK, this is a funny article as it stands . . . . but now read it again only substitute "cow" for "stripper." Not only does it still hold true, but will likely flush your nasal passages with coffee.

• And here we have a textbook case of environmental engineering and application.

I'm watching you

This is what I saw in the mirror this morning.

I think I *might* have a cornea infection.

Splishes and Splashes

On Saturday a convoy of 11 Jeeps headed into the Three Lakes Wildlife Management Area. On this ride we took the Secret Service-esque Dixie Jeep, which sports a black paint job, black tires and black wheels, and black tinted windows. Dixie started out as the pilot as we ran full bore into fairly deep mud puddles. About 10 minutes into the ride the electronics under the hood had

enough water and shut the machine down. In the middle of a puddle . . . of course. I got out and slogged through the much so that we could be towed to higher ground. After a couple of minutes the Jeep healed itself and we were on our way. After breaking for lunch we switched seats. I disengaged the 4 wheel drive and spent the last half of the trip sending rooster tails of mud 40 feet into the air (and onto the hood of whoever followed too close!)

It was all fun and games until Sunday . . . . . or clean up day, as it were. For some unknown reason Dixie took ill and was unable to clean her Jeep . . . . . but I felt fine. Funny, eh? AND to show that I am the nicest boyfriend on the planet, after cleaning her Jeep, I installed some beefy metal plates on the side of it to prevent rock-rash on the body panels. The mad shuffling of Jeeps made for an interesting sight in my driveway. (Note how the black Jeep shines!)

Randomness

This weekend the Jeeps hit the trail. We are going somewhere different this time and I have never been there before. Sounds like it is going to be a tame ride - but seeing new scenery will be nice. The destination is called the Three Lakes Wildlife Management Area and is just north of the bustling metropolis of YeeHaw Junction, home of the Desert Inn.


Here is another picture from the South America trip. As you can infer from the photograph this was a very serious trip and a pivotal point of our business education.

The Lovely Cate Classmate is standing there next to me as we waft the vapors from the oak aging casks. The reason for my smile is four-fold:

1. I am wearing my favorite and very understated yellow jacket.
2. Cate pinched my butt just before the photo was taken.
3. Wine.
4. It was cold enough to actually wear the cashmere scarf that was recently purchased in Buenos Aires without looking like a dork. (I know Dixie will disagree with that.)

This is my nephew Michael. While on a visit in North Carolina we wandered upon a spring-fed stream with pristine crystal-clear water. As you can see by the present turbidity, a six year old can really have an impact on the environment. I believe in this picture he was making a convincing case as to why I needed to roll up my jeans, remove my socks and shoes and join him in his quest for gold nuggets and quartz crystals. Although his reasoning was varied and extensive I remained on the bank.